5 Ways to Build Emotional Intelligence at Home

Academic success starts with emotional intelligence. When children understand and manage their feelings, they’re more likely to build healthy relationships, handle challenges, and thrive in school and beyond.

The good news? Emotional intelligence isn’t something kids are born with, it’s something we can teach and nurture every day, starting right at home.

Here are five simple ways to help your child grow emotionally strong, self-aware, and kind.

🧠 1. Help Them Name Their Feelings

The first step to emotional intelligence is understanding emotions. Young children often act out because they don’t yet have the words to explain how they feel.

You can help by:

• Naming emotions when you see them (“You’re feeling frustrated because the block tower fell.”)

• Reading books about feelings and asking, “How do you think that character feels?”

• Using visuals like emotion charts or emoji flashcards

📌 Tip: Avoid saying “You’re okay” when they’re upset, instead, acknowledge the feeling and help them work through it.

🫶 2. Model the Behaviors You Want to See

Children learn more from what we do than what we say. If you want your child to handle frustration calmly or express themselves clearly, they need to see you doing it too.

Try this:

• Narrate your own feelings: “I’m feeling a little overwhelmed right now, so I’m going to take a deep breath.”

• Talk through your problem-solving process: “I’m upset, but instead of yelling, I’m going to ask for help.”

🗣️ 3. Create Space for Feelings, Even the Big Ones

All feelings are valid, even the loud or messy ones. Instead of trying to stop a meltdown immediately, create safe, calm spaces for your child to express themselves.

• Use a “calm corner” or “peace place” where they can breathe, rest, or reset

• Teach coping strategies like squeezing a pillow, using sensory tools, or belly breathing

• Let them know: “It’s okay to feel angry, it’s not okay to hit.”

At Soaring Hearts Preschool, we use social-emotional activities daily to help children explore emotions and find healthy outlets for big feelings.

💬 4. Practice Problem-Solving Together

When your child faces a conflict (with a sibling, friend, or task), walk through solutions with them instead of solving it for them.

You might ask:

• “What do you think we could try?”

• “What would be a kind way to say that?”

• “Let’s come up with two choices that feel fair.”

The more they practice, the more confident they’ll become at handling challenges independently.

🌱 5. Praise the Process, Not Just the Outcome

Emotional intelligence grows when children feel safe to try, fail, and try again. Instead of saying “Good job,” try:

• “I saw how patient you were waiting for your turn!”

• “You were so brave when you told your friend how you felt.”

• “That was a hard moment, and you stayed calm. That’s not easy!”

Encouraging self-awareness and emotional effort helps build resilience.

Raising emotionally intelligent kids doesn’t require a perfect script, it just takes small, intentional steps, day by day. By creating a home where feelings are named, accepted, and managed with care, you’re giving your child a foundation that will serve them for life.

Want to partner with a preschool that supports emotional development every single day?

Visit soaringheartspreschool.com to learn more about our SEL-based programs for young learners.